Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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