You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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