break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
