After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Randomize
