Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
