is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
