Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
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