plz talk dirty to me
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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