Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
