Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
