she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
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