I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
