this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
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