if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
