Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize