summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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