i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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