We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
