Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Randomize
