"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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