While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
Randomize
