dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
