That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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