hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Randomize
