So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
