Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
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