just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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