No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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