We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
