Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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