I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Randomize
