ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Randomize
