I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
