i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
