She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
