shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
