this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Randomize
