I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I stole a fireplace last night.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
