It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I want a musical about memes.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
