im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
