That's intense
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Randomize
