im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
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