smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize
