Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
