My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize
