party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Randomize
