with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
this hospital has no fireball
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
You ate ashes out of my bong
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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