my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
