help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
Barsexuality is the new black.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Randomize
