So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
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